Could it be...my last post was April?  Well, as was the situation then, it is again, I confess.   Confusion and random life situations have placed themselves in my path, and kept me from my diligent quest to maintain a record of thoughts, feelings and lessons learned here on my blog.

Where to begin?

As I peruse the last few posts (so long since) I remember the thoughts and focus I had at that time.  So many ways things have changed, and in many nothing new. 

Health:  The big one.  (No pun intended, HA)  I feel the Lord directed me to words that started me on a new journey.  I researched a successful organization that refers and assists patients to a world renowned bariatric surgeon in Mexico and the doors opened up so quickly for me, that I was whisked into a world of positive experience and kind encouragement to finally tackle the weight issue that was becoming a physical and mental burden to me and my dear family.  I made reference to this situation in an earlier post.  Ups and downs and a winding path is the way I trod.  Looking back now, though, it was all for a reason and the Lord has shown His love and tender mercy in so many ways that I would have not experienced if there were another way.  All that said, and I am leaving way too much out, but...drum roll loudly playing in your head please...I am ninety pounds lighter today!!  Amazing and with God's grace I am much happier, healthier and productive! 

School:  Over the summer it was a burden I carried and blamed my busy-ness and my distraction with other "things" but finally came heart to heart with my decision on whether to homeschool Victoria or not.  Before the school year ended we took ourselves to the school of choice and interviewed and were interviewed.  It was decided that all was well and the paperwork was signed, cheques given and teacher met.  The handbook was brought home to be studied and discussed.  In a blur the summer was over and school year was begun and my sweet, energetic, always homeschooled ten year old was dropped off at the door of the "big bad wolf's den of twaddle infested socially inept boring jailed in academy of learning".   Thankful, I took my little one home to the safety of my "no pressure, twaddle free messy unorganized comfortable crazy mold infested overcrowded animal overrun busy homeschool".  I would be the hero at least, to her for one more year.  To our happy surprise (and my secret disappointment) my girl LOVED the structure and twaddle and social awkwardness!  She has had a little catching up, but came through with flying colors and has adjusted academically very well.  Dramatist that she is, things are a little zany sometimes, with the "he said, she said" of the social life of eleven year olds, but all in stride, I say.  Continually learning and grasping those opportunities for character development!  Angel is home with Mommy and we are hopping from stone to stone with the fun of learning to read, write and learn one plus one's.  We'll see what is in store for next year,  I have learned not to look too far into the future and plan.  God is better at that "planning" stuff, and is always working things together for my good...

Home:  well, how do I say it...all's well that ends well.  The basement is re-done (new floors, walls, doors etc etc) and I have four extra people boarding in that space.  Love the company, hate the mess, love the family hate the drama.  "Nuff said.

Still searching for the formula to a joyful contented life.  My research and experience tell me that it is in the little things.  In the moments, not days or weeks.  Being thankful is a huge contributor as well.  Always seeking the right answers, and the wise solutions to the stumbles and failures.  God is good.  That is a little statement, but can speak to so much...

Here's to another new beginning~  we'll see how faithful I can be this time~  if there was just a way to get this on my i-Phone...something to look into...

April 1--round...watching eagle eggs live, ready to hatch...dedicated mother bird; spinning ballerina; hamburgers shared
April 2--white...lily of the valley in my window; big white truck to drive; white ruffles on little girl dresses

April 3--surprisingly found...laundry dried and folded for me! (thank you!); many job opportunities for the worker

Have not kept up to date and so much "life" has occurred in our family the past 6 months...

I have watched a sister agonize over the loss of her marriage and her children suffer great emotional damage.  I have tried to comfort, support and uphold them in love and prayers and watch God work in the darkness of this regrettable situation. 
My Dad has had recurring health concerns, at times very serious, and I have wondered about the reality of losing this one who raised, nurtured and loved me.  We have survived great loss together.  He is my Dad.  I spent a week with him to remind him that he is loved by this daughter he nurtured and raised.  Precious memories...lots unspoken...
Was, and still am, privileged to offer hospitality to lots of guests in the home we moved into in November.  Large space, interesting yard...room to breathe.  With that blessing, though, comes lots of responsibility.  Moving is never easy, and of all the moves in the past 10 years, this one was the most physically difficult, but praise God for lots of help.  The dust is settling, and the process of organizing and setting up "nest" is slowly becoming a reality.  My sweet Aunt is so helpful and encouraging.  I have been blessed with her presence and so appreciate her tenderness, encouragement and listening ear.  Many conversations with those who have lived longer have transpired and we take away new thoughts, solidified goals and knowledge that we are loved and  prayed for by many.
School schedules have taken a "beating".  Not much directed study, but lots of life experience occurs daily.  Time to focus, reassess and move forward.  Searching for direction for the future.  We are blessed with two very individual, intelligent children.  We seek to know their hearts are tuned to right, and that they are exposed to doctrine, reproof, correction and instruction in righteousness, so they may succeed in this world, both spiritually and humanly speaking.
A time of renewal for our marriage was overdue, and efforts are being made to re-establish a close knit bond that helps guide our thoughts and minds toward our family's future. A spiritual rekindling must be tended for our marriage's health and future.  Confronted with the adversary's success in depleting the sacred vow of loved ones has "shocked and awed" us into taking decisive action in being watchful for any cracks that can cause a crumbling.
Health issues, ever present, ever pressing, have taken me, personally, on an emotional and stressful roller coaster ride these past six months.  I have given and received, but finally have placed this priority on a lower "shelf" for now.  I felt this was necessary for my mental stability, so as to offer my family a more focused energy to help us reach an equilibrium in our daily life.  Once established, seeking the Lord's guidance, I will revisit my options down the road.  Being the non-confrontational being that I am, I still struggle with the closure of these issues with regard to the professionals involved.  Need to work on that...
Our future is before us.  We are floundering with the decisions facing us as we work to become financially unburdened, find a way to prioritize our lives.  God must be first.  We know that...there may be NO "buts"... The rest should follow in an orderly sequence for us to realize true peace and contentment.  Our quest...

Hope to keep up more regular again.

 II Peter 1:3-9:

• According as his divine power hath given unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of him that hath called us to glory and virtue:

• Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

• And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge;

• And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness;

• And to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity.

• For if these things be in you, and abound, they make you that ye shall neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.

• But he that lacketh these things is blind, and cannot see afar off, and hath forgotten that he was purged from his old sins. 

 (in verse 5 it says) "Add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge." The word "add" in the Greek carries the idea of adding at one's own expense. If you're willing to pay a price, you can be sure there will be a reward in the end."   ...Mark Hamby

Meditating on these words today...

on injustice

"If we would yield to the will of God, peaceably waiting for His hand to work, we would see God deliver us right in the midst of our enemies. We would eat at the banquet table in the midst of the hardship, false accusation, and humiliation. Vengeance and deliverance are God's responsibility. Submission and a yielded spirit are ours."
~Mark Hamby


"Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over." Psalm 23:5

"Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord." Rom 12:19

Day by Day

Lina Sandell Berg, 1832–1903
Translated by Andrew L. Skoog, 1856–1934

"Day by day, and with each passing moment,
Strength I find to meet my trials here;
Trusting in my Father's wise bestowment,
I've no cause for worry or for fear.
He whose heart is kind beyond all measure
Gives unto each day what He deems best-
Lovingly, its part of pain and pleasure,
Mingling toil with peace and rest.

Ev'ry day the Lord Himself is near me
With a special mercy for each hour;
All my cares He feign would bear and cheer me,
He whose name is Counsellor and Pow'r.
The protection of His child and treasure
Is a charge that on Himself He laid;
"As thy days, thy strength shall be in measure,"
This the pledge to me He made.

Help me then in every tribulation
So to trust Thy promises , O Lord,
That I lose not faith's sweet consolation
Offered me within Thy holy word.
Help me Lord, when toil and trouble meeting,
E'er to take, as from a father's hand,
One by one, the days, the moments fleeting,
Till I reach the promised land."

“Day by Day” was written by a young Swedish woman who learned early in life the all-important lesson of living each day with the conscious presence and strength of her Lord. Lina Sandell has often been called the “Fanny Crosby of Sweden” for her many contributions to gospel hymnody. From her pen flowed approximately 650 hymns which strongly influenced the waves of revival that swept the Scandinavian countries during the latter half of the nineteenth century.

At the age of twenty-six Lina had an experience that greatly influenced her life. She was accompanying her father aboard ship to the city of Gothenburg, Sweden, across Lake Vattern. The ship gave a sudden lurch and Lina’s father, a Lutheran minister, fell overboard and drowned before the eyes of his devoted daughter. Although Lina had written many hymn texts prior to this tragic experience, now more than ever poetic thoughts that expressed a tender, child-like trust in her Lord began to flow freely from her broken heart.

http://www.scriptureandmusic.com/Music/Text_Files/Day_By_Day.html

thoughts to ponder....

"In the homeschool community I have observed that there can be a great emphasis on outward appearance, whether it is dressing for excellence, modesty, grooming, respectful manners, music style, or an attitude of sober reverence in worship. Some even take their children down a country path of humble fashions, raising food, and making bread. Nothing is wrong with any of these things, but we must be careful - we can model for our children outward changes and easily fall into molding their behavior and/or appearance, while missing their hearts. In some circles emphasis on the outward is epidemic.
A friend of mine, a homeschool mom, just passed away of cancer. In the week before she died, I asked her if she had any regrets in her life. She told me she wished she had baked less bread - she said if she had it to do over again she would buy bread and spend more time with her children. She had invested time and energy in pursuing the "path" because she thought it was part of the spiritual homeschool package."

 excerpt from joshharris BLOG

striped handsome"ness"
older daughter writing stories, AND...reading them to little sister who does not feel well
raspberry ice cream cake
ENT specialist who skillfully removes earring back from a little one's ear canal!
kind dentist, and numbness
warm lips to kiss at lunchtime
pumpkin spice latte
missionaries

...scenes of a get-a-way...

spontaneous whisper Saturday past, into a ready... eager ear
led us to a wandering drive west.  rocky.  jagged.  lofty.
emerald spikes, gunpowder and tin grays, fuzzy whites
viridian (green)
cerulean (blue)
unspeakable
alive.
big.
small.